thursday morning, i was driving down the gulf road listening to my jazz collection, the sun was shining and traffic almost nonexistent - "dream a little dream of me" by ella fitzgerald and louis armstrong sounded like heaven and i thought what a beautiful day, i am so blessed!
that serene morning cascaded down the day, but naturally, all good things come to an end and the day quickly turned into a nightmare as we reached the airport to pick up the in-laws at night - we were expecting to fight our way out of the traffic, but catching the parking's elevator felt more like pearl harbor!
the first kamikaze we faced was an egyptian woman, who stopped the elevator and pushed her trolley into the full cabin - the guys inside tried to reason with her as there was no space to fit her in, but in vain - she begged them to let her in as her kids awaited her on the first floor and kept pushing until one of the guys took his suitcase and placed it on her trolley, she squeezed everybody and made it in while we all stood flabbergasted!
the second kamikaze stood by the second elevator - he was a thin guy who tried some acrobatics to squeeze himself in, but couldn't find a place to land a foot, so he backed off - just as the doors closed, a macho man tries to squeeze in, we labeled him kamikaze number 3 evolution, the strongest and most persistent.
number 3 evolution was a tall and chubby guy who never takes no for an answer - he basically believed that he can succeed where the thin guy failed - so he tried to step in but couldn't find space, so he simply stood there waiting for the elevator to close in - but his shoulders and big fat ass were standing in the way and we thought that he would abort mission - abort mission? no, not him.. kamikaze 3 evolution presses the nitro-boost-button, grabs the asian man in front of him from behind, pushes him in by force (though he looked as if he was sodomising him) and steps in!
for a moment we thought we were in a t3 movie, the scene was surreal, but hey... this is the civilized world we live in!
a few days ago, we made a post about elevator etiquette 101 and we ranted about that lady who blocked our way out insisting to walk in first - well, we'd like to apologies from that fine lady, she was an angel compared to those kamikazes.